fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Randomize
