Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I need moral support for this bender
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Randomize