there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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