new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
