Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Randomize
