But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
