Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
We left the knife in your bed.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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