Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize