So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
