Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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