So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
