Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
