White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
