but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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