we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
