i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
