he puts the penis in happiness.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
We're too hungover to prance.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
