no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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