I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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