youre lurking in front of me
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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