hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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