Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
So drunk its hurt
Redeem this text for a blowjob
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
