I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
