sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
