margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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