We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
