I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
