he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Small penises have feelings too.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
