He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
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