I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
