i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
