She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
We left an ass print on the piano.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize