I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
