I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Randomize
