whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize