Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
