I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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