Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
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