I'm gonna have a badass scar
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
