do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You ruined the universe
Randomize
