Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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