You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize
