If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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