I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
