its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize