She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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