It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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