found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
