One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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