this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i just sent this text using only my big toe
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
