omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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