Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
