1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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